Dreams shattered

I am sad!
I have dreams, but it seemed that it has been broken last night!
I really place very high hope in it last night but due to my over-confidence, I destroyed it myself! I hate myself!
I cried when I came out last nite! For being stupid, for being over-nervous!
Why? Why cant I do it?
I need lots n lots of time to heal before I decide whether I should choose to go for the lessons! This decision cant be made overnite!
I want my dreams that I have since I am young to come through! I have dreams but is it too far for me to reach?
Or is it just confidence that I need?
I am confused! I am sad! I am stupid! Why cant I push myself more? Why must I be nervous? Why?

Thanks Huiling for the confidence that you have in me! Though you didnt know me well, but yet you believe in me! Thanks! :)